Diana Rene: 0:06

You're listening to the Decluttered Mom Podcast, a podcast built specifically for busy moms by a busy mom. I'm your host, Diana Rene. And in 2017, I had my second daughter and it felt like I was literally drowning in my home. Okay, not literally, but I felt like I couldn't breathe with all of the stuff surrounding me. Over the next 10 months, I got rid of approximately 70% of our household belongings, and I have never looked back. I kind of feel like I hacked the mom system, and I'm here to share all the tips, tricks, and encouragement. Let's listen to today's show.

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Decluttered Mom podcast. Today we're going to talk about simplifying gift giving this holiday season.

If you are like probably most moms out there, um you might be excited for the holidays, but you also are probably dreading the influx of the avalanche of toys and stuff and things and clutter that are going to enter your home over the next month or so. And so simplifying gifts is not really about limits. It's about leaving room for joy this holiday season. And I think that when we can more intentionally curate what we are giving our kids for gifts, then it just allows us to just feel really good about it—not only in the moment when we're giving the gift, but afterwards when we don't feel super stressed out after the fact, when we feel like it's just too much.

Like I remember what—prior to my decluttering and living more simply days, when my oldest was really little. And I remember like kind of going overboard, number one, with the amount of toys. But then just like after Christmas Day hit, just looking around and feeling really overwhelmed and kind of like, what did I—why did I do this? Like, why did I choose to get her this many things that she's probably not even going to play with, number one, and number two is just going to turn into something I end up donating in a couple months to get it out of the house because it's driving me crazy.

Uh, and so over the years, I've really worked hard on curating what I want to give my children for the holidays. And this is something that my husband and I have had to negotiate and compromise on because if it was up to him, I think he would give them every single possible thing he could because he just—his gifts are his love language. He really loves giving gifts. Um, and he really, you know, enjoys seeing our kids like be really excited when they open up a gift from us. And I get that, I totally get that.

If it was up to me, it would be like 99% experience gifts and like two physical gifts. And so we had to find a compromise. And we give our girls probably more physical gifts than I would probably like to, but it's okay because again, we are very intentional with the gifts we give them. And so that helps. That helps.

So some of the things, if your kids are younger, they're still playing with lots of toys. Something that you can do off the bat is just to choose more open-ended type toys. So, like some examples, Legos, Magnetiles, wooden blocks, a play kitchen, art supplies, dress-up clothes, craft kits. So, like things that have open-ended play, things that are not just like one and done toys or like you only play with this toy a specific certain way. Uh, toys that are going to really like build their imagination and let them use their imagination and play with them in like a bajillion different ways, right? Because we all know like Legos are not only played with as building blocks, like they are played with as all sorts of things in games and imaginary stories and things like that. And so having open-ended toys um is something that is really helpful.

Another thing is that I really like to focus on things that they maybe already need. So maybe it's like they are um playing in a—they're starting basketball in January and they've never played before. So maybe they get a basketball for Christmas, or maybe they get a bag that their basketball stuff goes in to and from practice and to the games. So thinking through things that they might already need still make great gifts. Um that was like primarily—primarily when I was a kid, most, I would say the majority of the gifts that we were given were things that we needed for our activities or just daily lives. I got so many clothes as a kid, I got shoes as a kid, I got um, if I was playing soccer, that's when I got all my soccer supplies was at Christmas or my birthday. It was like gifts. And there's nothing wrong with that. And I think that if you don't want to do all the gifts that way, that's totally cool. Like we do a big mix also. But clothing is another great one, especially if you have a kid that really enjoys new outfits or new clothes or is into fashion. Um, those make great gifts and it's something that they need anyway.

But what I really want to talk about in this episode is experience gifts. And so, like I said before, if it was up to me, I would give like the—almost all gifts as experience gifts. But I realize that if you have never given your kid an experience gift, they may not like it, at least at first, right? When they open it. They might be like, what the heck, man? Like, I don't want this piece of paper telling me I get to go somewhere because they're not used to it. That's not something that they understand. And so we have to remember that.

I know that I have when I've talked about experience gifts in the past, I've had people DM me on Instagram and they're like, "Yeah, well, my kids don't like it when I give them experience gifts. Like they get upset." Like one of my—I remember this specific DM where she was like, "My daughter like cried when she opened this gift and it was supposed to be like this big gift, and we were so excited for her, and she cried and then I felt terrible, and then she felt bad because she felt like she was being ungrateful," and it was like this whole thing, and I felt like it ruined Christmas morning. And that's obviously not what we want, right?

So if you are someone who would like to give experience gifts to your kids, but you never have before, I really, really suggest pairing it with a physical item so that they still have something tangible that they can open and they can see and they can hold on their hands because it's going to help them understand that this is an actual gift. This isn't just like some random promise slash dream off in the future that they can't like—their brains as children cannot materialize and understand. So giving them the physical item with the gift is something that's really, really helpful.

So let me give you two examples. Okay, so uh one time we gave my daughter karate lessons, and what we did instead of just saying, like, "Hey, you're getting karate lessons," or—we did make a little certificate that I just made on Canva. Instead of just doing the certificate, right, we also wrapped the outfit that she would need to wear for the karate lessons. So she got to open it, she got to see the outfit, she got to try the outfit on, it made her excited and it made her brain connect the fact that this um gift was something that she gets to go do with this physical item. We've also done this with dance class and uh leotard and also swim lessons with a new swimsuit and goggles. So that's just some ideas—is just to just wrap something that connects to that activity with the gift.

I know I said two examples, but I have another one. We gave um my other daughter, we gave her a "bake with me" day. And so I drew out a coupon and I put some fun, like little cooking/baking stickers on it. But then I also included the supplies that were needed for the baking day, and I also included printed recipes for the things that we would bake together. So this was super tangible for her. She was able to see the recipe cards, she was able to hold the supplies that we needed for those specific recipes, and then she also had the promise of doing that baking day.

Something that if you are a forgetful person, if you have ADHD like me, it's really helpful to schedule that date right away. So, like when she opens it, open up your calendar and be like, let's schedule it right now. So that way you have it on the calendar, because if not, it's really easy to just kind of forget about it. And then the kid kind of feels jipped, which they were gypped, right? They didn't actually get to do the thing, or it's like seven months later and they didn't get to do the thing still until then. And that does not help you in the future if you want to continue doing experience gifts. Because if you want to do experience gifts, you want it to make it an enjoyable thing. You want them to have good experiences with it when you've done it in the past. And so that's just one way to make sure that they have that good experience.

Okay, so I actually have a guide that you can get in the show notes. The link is in the show notes, but the guide is your experience gift guide. So it's gonna cover everything we talk about today in even more detail, but it's also gonna give you over 100 ideas for experience gifts in all sorts of budget categories. Um, but I wanted to give you just a couple of ideas here on the podcast, and then just to kind of get your wheels spinning, you know, and then if you just would like more ideas, then definitely check out that free—it's a free guide. It's a PDF that will be sent to you, and that will be really helpful.

So, there, like I said, uh, there can be very different budget things. Like you could gift your child something that is crazy expensive, or you could gift them an experience that is actually free, except for the few supplies that you buy for it, you know? And so I think whatever your budget is and whatever you want to do, I think you can find something that your kid will really, really like.

So one of the things that's maybe a little bit more pricey but is fun is that you could rent a bounce house—for your backyard for the day. Uh, if you don't have one at home, there are many rental companies that you can rent one, they'll come and they'll set it up. And it can be pricey, and that's why it's on that more expensive side, but you can just turn it into like this whole fun day outside and just having that in their backyard is probably going to make their day. Think about when your kids see like bounce houses at any type of event, they get really excited, right?

Another idea is to do like tickets to an escape room together. And so depending on where you live, that might not be very expensive, or it could be very expensive. It just kind of depends on the cost of living area that you're in, but that could be a really fun experience for you and the family, or you could gift it to them to do with their friends, especially if you have like teenagers or older kids that maybe they would want to do something like that with friends and maybe not necessarily with little brother and sister.

Pottery lessons. This is something my mom actually gave me last Christmas, and I—you guys, it's November and I still have not started them. So I need to take my own advice of putting in the calendar when I'm going to sign up for something. But I do have a coupon to be able to start pottery classes. I think that would be a really fun thing. Um, but again, it's kind of more on the side of a little more expensive.

You could do indoor water park tickets or if it's summer, outdoor water park tickets. Just spending the day at a water park could be really, really fun. Okay, so let's think about some of the things that are free.

And again, I have over a hundred ideas on that guide. So feel free to grab that in the show notes. So some free things. Maybe you have a kid who is really into cooking and they want to learn how to grill. So you could set up like grilling lessons with you or your spouse or an aunt or uncle that really loves to grill and set up like a couple times where you are able to—or the person is able to—teach your kid how to grill. Obviously, be safe. Make sure they're not too little and they're doing it safely.

This is not free, but this is a really cool one. So you could do a train and run a 5K with [insert adult who wants to do this here], right? Again, it could be you, it could be your spouse, it could be grandpa, it could be an aunt or uncle, it could be a good friend, family friend, whoever it is. You could set up like a whole training program with them and then train over however many months and then do the actual 5K with them. That would be really fun. Both of my girls have gotten into running 5Ks. Um, and so that's something that our family has started to do together is to continue the training and then do sign up and run these 5Ks together. And it's been really, really fun.

Another one that's free is you could, or again, not totally free, but could do a coupon for a day of fishing with you or a loved one who loves fishing. And so obviously it's not free because you have to have the fishing pool, but maybe you already have it, who knows? But you get my idea, right. You could do the baking day, like I mentioned before, you—and that would be free. You could have a sleepover with grandma coupon, um, and that would be free. You could do a movie night where they get to pick everything about the movie night. So they get to pick the movie, they get to pick where everybody sits, they get to pick the snacks or the dinner that's involved with the movie night, they get to be in charge of movie night. And depending on who your kid is, some kids wouldn't care at all about that, but some kids would love that. They would love the power and control over getting to decide all of the aspects of the movie night.

So these are just some fun ideas. Like I said, they have over a hundred in that free guide, but I hope this helps to just get your wheels spinning and helps you to start thinking about all of the different ways that you can make experience gifts work for you and your family.

I know with everything going on with the economy, Christmas might be feeling even more overwhelming right now. And so starting to implement some of these free or low-cost experience gifts could be something that could really help your Christmas budget on top of just not bringing more stuff into your home, right? And so I hope this is helpful.

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And so I really appreciate you being here and we'll see you next week. Thanks for hanging out and listening to the Decluttered Mom podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, it would mean the world if you could write a review or share this episode with a friend or your Instagram stories. And if you're on Instagram, be sure to follow me at the.decluttered.mom and send me a DM to say hi. I'd love to hear what you thought about today's episode. I hope you'll come back next week and hang out with us again.