I walked in through the back door of our house.
Riley was crying because we had to leave the park, because Lila was losing her mind at the park.
She was still mostly colicky, I don’t know what I was thinking trying to actually leave the house with both girls.
I was already overwhelmed, but walking in to our house and seeing all the stuff made me feel like I was DROWNING.
3 large piles on the kitchen table had now morphed into one messy, overflowing pile.
I could barely find a walkway to the couch with all the toys on the floor.
Last nights dirty dishes were still in the sink and the counter (ok and let’s be honest - it was probably a few days worth at this point).
I still hadn’t put away the new groceries from this morning bc the pantry was such a mess there wasn’t really room.
I turned Daniel tiger on for Riley, grabbed Lila out of the car seat and began my multiple times a day struggle just to get her to nurse.
I sat there on the couch and looked at all this STUFF around me, and I just cried.
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞.
Survival mode had become my status quo.
Once I finally got fed up and got rid of 70% of our belongings over the next year, the entire make-up of my home changed....
it didn’t have such a hold on me anymore.
It became an enjoyable and relaxing place that I actually liked taking care of - instead of this monster of burden and responsibility I couldn’t handle.
Can you relate?